Edition #12: Rester c'est exister
Mais voyager, c'est vivre
To stay is to exist, but to travel, is to live.
The above is (supposedly) a quote from a French writer. I say supposedly because I never trust the internet to pull accurate quotes. But I’m starting this edition from BOS as I wait to board my flight to Paris. I’m quite shocked I made it given I went to urgent care this morning for yet another ear infection and worked our last hybrid event of the recruiting season on campus. The horrors persist, but so do I. Kind of.
But spoiler alert—this is for sure NOT the #BTO-MY-LSFTY because I’m currently en route to CDG for my flight home. What follows is a #livestack (as best as I could manage with all the eating and drinking and walking) of the last four days in Paris. Apprécier!
19 AVRILE 2024
13:06 | I’m in the cab en route to our hotel with my sister after a hellish time trying to find my way to the sortie, since we were in different terminals. My right ear hurts, and it was bleeding throughout the flight. (Sorry if you’re squeamish but you know my salads don’t have a filter on them.) There was also a child who wailed for no less than two hours on the plane. This is one of the many reasons I am #childfreebychoice (and also by the luck of the Lord).
17:51 | We’ve donned our robes(!!!)1 and crawled into bed for a lie down before our dinner reservations. I’m on two hours of sleep.
20 AVRILE 2024
08:09 | We’re getting ready for the day. I think I’m finally feeling the jet lag, or is it just the general lack of sleep? Or perhaps it’s my twice daily amoxicillin! Who knows! I certainly don’t!
09:39 | Eating breakfast at Vrai Paris after stopping by Le Moulin Rouge, which is MUCH smaller IRL. Everything is so picturesque here I can’t stand it. Also, how are the French so lithe with all of this goddamn bread around?
17:45 | We’re back at the hotel and 20K steps in. I can’t wait to pee.
19:24 | We’ve emerged from our nap and are heading to dinner with my brother-in-law’s niece, who’s been living her for her master’s program and is starting a VERY COOL internship at a major fashion house. My sister and I have completely different wardrobe styles. New England has turned me into a boring bumpkin and I hate myself.
21:45 | We’re at a second spot for dessert and PUMPED there are espresso martinis on menu.
23:10 | My brother-in-law’s niece has introduced us to a shot call “baby Guinness”2 that she drank while in Dublin for the week with her master’s program. Surprise, there’s no Guiness in them. We’re thrilled the bartender knows what this is.
21 APRILE 2024
00:34 | We’ve posted ourselves next to the DJ and are staring longingly at the smokers outside the bar. They look like they’re having a good time. Should I become a smoker?
02:45 | We’re home. Makeup is off. Lost track of the number of drinks imbibed all day but the vibe was 11 out of 10.
12:11 | We’re finally out to door to lunch with our suitcases packed, since we’re moving to my sister’s work hotel tonight. One of us has been throwing up all morning. We’re both unwell and surprised we checked out on time.
13:03 | We did not get bread for the table. I don’t know why this is bothering me so much but probably because I am hungover and would like a piece of bread.
15:18 | Did some shopping (thrilled about my new red trench coat) and taking a break at the Jardin du Luxembourg. We’re dying at a group of girls doing a photo shoot for a bachelorette trip. The wind made sand go everywhere. This photographer must hate them.
20:03 | Waiting to get on the boat for our dinner cruise! My sister and I are donning our new trenches. I feel so bloated. I also cannot forget to take my antibiotics.
22:37 | An older American couple seated near us has been fighting all night. Wife told the husband he can take the massive Louis Vuitton they just bought bag back. “One of us is a liar, and I’m not a liar,” the wife said. Yikes!
22 APRILE 2024
00:31 | This is the earliest we’ve gotten into bed since arriving. Kass’ conference prep starts tomorrow, so I’m on my own for the day. Can’t wait to see what trouble I get into when left to my own devices.
09:55 | About to venture out! Wish me luck as I navigate the Paris metro solo to Le Louvre.
10:17 | Not a strong start. Went to a different station, not the metro. Whoops!
10:19 | On the metro, but wrong direction. I am truly a country bumpkin and so upset about this.
10:50 | Okay, after a few false starts, I made it to Le Louvre! My mother told me to go see the Mona Lisa but I want to walk around and enjoy the day.
11:54 | My bonne journée sounds convincing enough that the sales people don’t assume I’m American and start asking me if I need help in French. It’s nice.
12:40 | I’ve finally stopped for a croque monsieur and aperol spritz. I’m excited for a little break.
13:20 | A massive Italian tour group walks into the restaurant. The woman next to me says something in English and I respond in Italian. Excited, she asks if I’m from Italy and I say no, America. She misunderstood and asked where in France and I replied, “No, no, I’m from the States.” She goes, “Oh, I’m sorry.” It’s okay, me too? We then proceed to parliamo Italiano and I realize I’m in the wrong country. I miss Italy.
15:35 | I’m in a Zara dressing room. Why are the basics so much better here?!
16:20 | Found myself back at Le Louvre. It’s been just under 20K steps and I need a snack. Or a drink. Or both.
16:31 | I’ve popped into Le Musset, right by the Louvre. I’m craving Sancerre and French onion soup. Reminder to self that I need to buy wine to take home.
20:15 | After a harrowing time trying to check in to my flight and getting ready, I’m finally off to my final dinner in Paris with the niece. It’s raining—again!—but I have my fantastic new red trench coat. One of my step sisters says it looks like I’m A in Pretty Little Liars.
20:31 | Realized I picked a restaurant in the neighborhood I was in all day today. I’m always a mess before my period and why didn’t I plan things out? Do I care? Why do I care? Is this why I feel like a bloated country bumpkin and hate myself? (Yes, I am PMSing. At this point you could all track my cycle if you wanted.)
22:30 | Popped into another place on my way back to the hotel because I decided I wanted something sweet. Had the WORST crème brûlée of my life. I think my waiter felt bad that I didn’t finish it because he gave me two macarons. They’re in my purse.
22:42 | This is my third time taking the metro from Le Louvre today. I kind of miss this life? I miss walking around the city in a stylish outfit with somewhere to go, a place to be. I’m having another existential crisis in Paris. Should I move here?3
23 AVRILE 2024
00:32 | My sister is back from her client dinner and we’re both in bed after debriefing from the days we had apart. What a fun job she has! The event manager of the restaurant kept calling the sushi bar “sushi animation” and we can’t stop laughing about it.
08:11 | Dragged myself out of bed so I could shower and finish packing. I don’t remember my sister leaving for her conference at all this morning. I ended up hitting 30K steps yesterday. Given today’s a travel day, my Apple Watch might think I’m dead and will shame me for not making it a 7-day workout week. My Apple Watch can fuck off.
09:05 | Down at continental breakfast. I’ve found myself at a table where I can see my reflection as I shove all the different types of croissants on my plate (three) into my mouth. I have never looked more attractive.
09:35 | My sister is back in the room and just informed me there is no McDonald’s at the airport. I cannot believe I didn’t eat at a French McDonald’s this entire trip. Très déçu.
10:35 | LOL THE ROAD TO THE HOTEL WAS CLOSED SO I LOST MY FIRST UBER DRIVER. But reporting live from my second car, he was very communicative and I will tip him even though you don’t tip in Europe. Must be nice to be in a place that offers livable wages!
10:26 | Inching towards my departure gate. I hope my bottles of vin make it okay.
10:51 | In the line to drop off my bottles of vin. Was just asked if I have large powdery substances in my luggage. Sir. I do not, but would be nice.
10:57 | The bag drop off was surprisingly easy and automated. Why can’t America do these things?
11:28 | Making my final purchases abroad, including a fourth bottle of wine. I am terrified to look at my credit card account when I get home.
11:40 | I lied. Needed water and more snacks even though I bought a box of 12 macarons to freeze from Ladurée when I get home.
12:06 | I don’t get how people aren’t hot in the airport I am SWEATING and so I’ve taken off my shirt and am now pacing in front of my bags. I’m ready to shower. Again!
12:23 | I’m going to schedule this post now so y’all get that 7:00 a.m. email drop that you’re used to. You’re welcome!
12:35 | In the zone 4/5 line and wondering how my ears will do on this flight. I did buy a CBD drink to try before takeoff.
12:54 | Just tried to scan my passport instead of my boarding pass. I need to sit down.
12:56 | Gonna pause here since apparently I put the wrong month in my OOO message. Everyone can fuck all the way off. AU REVOIR!
And so concludes the most chaotic #saladstack to date, which is saying a lot if you’ve read the first 11 editions. Catch y’all back stateside!
P.S. Unpopular thought but I didn’t love TTPD. Can’t wait to hit U.S. soil and get a million angry texts!
Recently liked on Spotify:
Recently listened to in the car:
The bar DJ played this—yes, the original version—on Saturday night. HS BF and I used to play the remix version a lot, so my sister and I SCREAMED when we heard the first few notes. I think this was the point the DJ realized he hated us.
My favorite thing from the weekend:
Hard to pick one photo for obvious reasons but Tiff pointed out the 44 on the table mat. Angel guides, those holy bitches are always looking out for us.
Y’all know how much j’adore a good hotel robe.
My sister kept calling them “baby Russians.”
Every time I travel I want to move and clearly this trip isn’t any different.